Time Travel for Idiots
by MaggiePapaya
Summary: The boys' are thrown mysteriously from their own time into the present where they encounter a girl, a clutz, but polite. WAY BETTER summary on the inside. Yelling, breaking stuff, and maybe a little romance on the side makes for a wonderful meal for the i
1. Default Chapter

Chapter One

"Well, another wonderful day at school, and another boring-ass day to boot." She sighed as she walked home from her bus stop. It was a mild fall day and the sun shone brightly through the foliage overhead cutting weaving patterns across her face as she strolled leisurely to her home three blocks away. The breeze blew softly through her fine, but thick mane of hair parted to one side and it wafted a few rebel strands into her face. Usually her hair in her face would have bothered her but she couldn't put it back because of a recent haircut to shoulder-length and today she didn't seem to mind.

"Lemme see now…I have Geometry page 247 numbers 9-21, Western Civ chapter 11 section 4 to read, and a Lit essay to write. On top of that I have to go to art, but I love art so really that doesn't count." It was the same thing she did every day in her average life, walk home from her bus stop, reviewing the homework from the day and plotting out her daily activities. It may have been trivial, but her mind was always cluttered and if she didn't keep all of her thoughts in order, everything would go straight to hell. Even the littlest things mattered.

Now remembering all that she was required to do, she continued her walk home staring off into the baby-blue sky above and marveling in its beauty. She loved the feel of any breeze, warm or cold, flow through her hair and kiss her on her rosy cheeks. Hiking was one of her favorite pastimes, coming in second only to painting and cooking. As she continued musing over petty things floating through her subconscious…a tremendous, earth-rocking explosion was heard from no more than 100 feet in front of her. She shrieked, thinking that her life would be cut short, and fell right onto her posterior. When she recovered from the shock, she dusted herself off and jogged ahead to see what could have possibly caused such a noise in her insignificant town.

Houses, trees, fences, all flew pass her in a blur as she continued towards the direction of the sound. Even if she hadn't heard the sound, which she would have had to have been deaf not to hear even though she did have her moments of sluggishness, the crowd gathered around what looked like a crater certainly would have drawn her attention.

Mumbles of "Who are they?" and "I wonder how they got here." Were heard through the thick wall of human bodies. The girl slowly squeezed her way through the mass, being careful to remember her manners saying "Excuse me, pardon me." When she got to the center, four teenage boys, clothes completely tattered and looking just as equally ragged themselves were sprawled out on their posteriors staring at the crowd of people all gaping at them.

"Get out of here! There's nothing to see, so what are you people doing just gawking at these poor boys! And you people didn't even bother to help them! Jeeze, where were YOU when they were passing out manners? For crying out loud!" she screamed as she began shooing away the crowd, some indignant and others shamed. She helped the four boys up, meanwhile dusting them off and studying them with her brilliant forest-green eyes.

"So, it seems that you three have gotten yourselves into quite a bit of trouble, no?" she asked with a stern visage splayed across her face.

One of the group, tall and handsome looking man with short white hair just scowled at the girl for even daring to reprimand him.

Two of the four, one with tawny hair, the other with auburn hair, blushed in embarrassment at being chastised by a female, especially a HUMAN female. Their cherubic faces, flushing as they were with a rose pink, made the girl's heart melt right out of her chest, and she blushed in return for seeming so forceful and severe.

The last teen, ostensibly the one in charge although also the quietest, did not show any emotion at her comment. He replied, "Yes, well obviously. But if you'll excuse us please, we need to find out where we are and how the hell to get back to where we belong." After so concisely stating his mind, he turned around and started walking away from her and the trio fell behind him, with the two angelic ones looking back longingly, pleading her to explain to them what was going on and to get them out of their unruly predicament.

As she watched them recede into the distance, she lost control of herself. Usually when she had just got done showing kindness to strangers, she at least had received thank you's and sometimes even rewards.

"WAIT ONE DAMN MOMENT SIR! Just who the hell do you think you are? I helped you, and now you think that you MAY be able to get back to where you were just by walking? I DON'T THINK SO! You're all going to need some help with this, so stop being such a stubborn ass and " she blushed again at her sudden outburst as he turned to look at her. The other three, perplexed by her forwardness, stood staring wide-eyed at her. She then said quietly and daintily, "And of course, you're all probably hungry, and tired and you need some new clothes. Please come to my house with me. You shouldn't be TOO much trouble."

One of the boys with a cherubic face and a huge collar reading 'H' pranced over to her and smiled while batting his long eyelashes and saying, "Oh c'mon Kiba, we can't deny room and board from a pretty young lady like herself. Plus, I'm hungry…" And just as to prove his point, his stomach growled loudly.

"Well, you're always hungry, but I won't deny help from you miss, even if you are a bit…loud…at times. And you can stop calling me 'Sir,' my name's Kiba and that is what I would prefer to be called. The tall, surly-looking one is Tsume, the youngest is Toboe, and the one with the collar is Hige."

"Well, then let's get moving! My house is only about a block away. I'm a good chef and I love to cook, especially for new people. And you can all take a shower when you get there because, no offense or anything, you all smell like something my cats dragged in…" but she was cut off before she could finish.

"CATS! You have cats!" Hige screamed. The others all had looks of worry plastered on their faces.

"Well yes, of course, if you're allergic I can…"

"No, no," a sly grin rolling across his face, "Cats are FINE."

'I definitely don't like that look on his face, but I guess it's just nothing.' She thought.

"Oh! And my manners! Where have they all flown off to? My name is Sumi. Hajimemashite."

Sumi led the way with Hige and Toboe trailing her every step, asking questions, getting answers, some that they didn't like, but getting their answers nonetheless. Tsume and Kiba stayed behind a little ways confident that if they were separated, they could easily find their way back together again.

"Do you think we can trust her?" Tsume asked with somewhat of a skeptical tone, his face mirroring his tone of voice.

"I'm not sure, she seems ditzy and polite, this is nice but it is odd. We can't stay with her for long; we have to get back to our home. Although I feel that it is easier said than done." Kiba replied.

"I was afraid of that."

"Well here we are." Sumi piped up from the front of the group. "It sure isn't much but it's enough for me." The house was a small typical Japanese-style two story home with sliding paper and wood doors. A long snakelike walkway led up from the street and was presently coated with a thin layer of dead leaves that crisped under their feet as they walked. Many flowers and other forms of growth surrounded the porch area and continued down the side of the house acting as a gate into an unknown land.

The four teenagers gazed at the house as if they had never seen such a thing before in their entire lives.

"What, haven't you guys ever seen a house before?" Sumi asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm, and adding a bit of a giggle at the end.

"Not like this we haven't. This is way ancient to us." Replied Hige.

"So you really aren't from around here are you? Are you from a big city?"

"Nope, this is just new."

"Well, it's chilly out here. Let's go inside, then we can get you all cleaned up, fed, and then maybe we can do something to get to know each other."

'Oh for the love of the moon, not games, please, anything but games!' Tsume thought. He had never been the one to be fiddling with such foolishness and on top of that, he wasn't what you would call "a people person."

Sumi turned her brass key in her door and entered followed by Hige, Toboe, Kiba and finally Tsume. They all gasped at the interior of the house, except for Sumi of course who just looked at them knowingly. Almost everyone had this reaction when they entered the anteroom of her home.


	2. A Home

**Disclaimer:** Durr, of course I don't own Wolf's Rain…I don't even know what I'd do if I DID own it. Oh, I know…. DVDs!!!!! I also have an original character, if you couldn't figure that our already.

**Rating: **R for a reason, cough LEMONS! coughBut, for all you lemon fans, it won't be coming up for some time, but let me tell you, those Earth's Children books REALLY help…wink, wink

Please, read and respond. This is my first fic ever, and I'm just talking out of my ass as I go along. Ideas could be nice.

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Chapter 2

The five were surrounded by walls of every color of the rainbow, and more. Flowers, creatures, and landscapes soared above their heads in oil, acrylic and watercolor. Kiba's eyes were drawn to a perfect portrait of a pale white wolf. It stood in the painting, regally, looking down at all who entered the house seemingly acting as a guard. The snow blew its fur around its face and the eyes were a rich gold that bore into the souls of all onlookers.

After a moment of wondrous gazing, the five removed their shoes and laid them in neat little rows. Sumi wandered from the foyer and headed through a doorway covered in painted ivy to the right, entering her living room. From the silence and serenity of the house came a slow but methodical music, played by a symphony orchestra. It somehow always reflected the mood of the house's guests, as if by some sort of magic.

She came into the room, "Mozart, one of the greatest composers of all time." Her eyes turned towards to ceiling, drawing the eyes of her guests heavenward as well. "He's my inspiration for a lot of these. Especially that one." She said as she turned her head in the direction of the white wolf and pointed her finger directly at it. "I think it's my favorite." She said with a wide grin.

"And you're parents let you do this?" Toboe asked.

"Oh, they don't seem to mind all that much. Sometimes, they enjoyed it." She replied with a furtive countenance that also expressed fear and sadness. It intrigued Kiba and Hige. Tsume noticed the look but chose not to care and Toboe completely missed the look on her face because his eyes were still glued to the spectacular walls creating a wondrous arbor overhead.

She smiled and said, "What am I jabbering on about? I promised you all food and a shower. The bath is upstairs to the right, and if you need clothes just yell and I'll bring some." She pranced to the left of the foyer and proceeded through yet another doorway into the kitchen, followed swiftly by Hige, who was drooling, anxious to be receiving food for the first time in days. Banging and the slamming of pots resounded throughout the house as Tsume and Kiba headed towards the living room to rest, socialize, and possibly to take a nap before dinner. Toboe charged up the stairs, hardly able to resist the generous offer and the urge to bathe and get out of the torn and haggard clothes he wore.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Hige kept his eyes perpetually on the frying pan persistently asking how much longer it would take to finish the food.

"How much longer now?!" He would ask pleadingly.

"Just a bit longer, steaks still need to sear on the other side for two minutes then they get plopped into the oven and cook for a bit until they're medium." She said as she continued her work in font of the stove, which couldn't be called work for her because she had such a passion for cooking, and the only thing that surpassed her in happiness was painting. She enjoyed keeping herself as busy as a little bee so that she could forget all of the things of her past and concentrate on the present and the future, knowing that everything would turn out better.

"But I like my steaks rare." He whined. "And preferably still kicking." He licked his chops.

"I hope you're kidding…" When he didn't reply, she continued to chastise him saying, "You have to know that you can pick up all sorts of bacterium that way. You could get a stomach virus!"

"Ah, who cares? A little bug now and then never hurt anyone." He replied casually, placing both of his arms behind his head and producing a large, toothy smile. This caused Sumi to blush madly. She didn't know why, but for some reason whenever he smiled at her, she felt all tingly inside and became insanely embarrassed. She had to admit, he was cute.

She averted her attention back to the hot frying pan and began flipping the steaks so that Hige couldn't see her blush, but he had already noticed. Hige didn't miss much of women and he reveled in seeing the reactions he could produce from his adorable charm.

Sumi headed for the refrigerator and opened the door, removing a carton of milk from a shelf and placing it on the island in the middle of the kitchen. "Milk okay with you?"

"Sure." And there was that smile again. This time she couldn't advert her eyes from his gleaming face and forgot to stop pouring milk from the carton, invariably spilling it all over the counter. This made her blush even madder and curse at herself for being such a damn klutz.

"Shit! Why the hell do I always do that?!" She screamed at herself.

He was utterly stupefied and his face was priceless. His jaw hung wide open, catching flies, his eyes boggled out of his head and he froze right on the spot, a.k.a. deer in headlights.

"Why are you giving me that look?" She asked in an agitated tone that was so different than her normal, quietly kind way of speaking.

He stammered. "Well…. uh…you just kinda …cursed… a lot. It just startled me, that's all. It just wasn't something I'd expect from you. Like hearing a moo come out of a frog."

"Well, gomen nasai." She began heading back to the stove to place the large and quite heavy frying pan into the hot oven. Unbeknownst to her a tiny waterfall of milk had dripped to the floor, causing it to become slick. She tried to walk with as much stateliness as she could muster but unluckily for her, the milk lay in wait like a rattlesnake for a mouse. She took but two steps and shrieked as she slipped and flew towards Hige, who appeared quite frightened. Fortunately, for his wolfish reflexes, he extended his arms and caught her, but her momentum caught up with him and they both toppled over, covered in milk, laughing hysterically.

"Sorry again. Stupid clutzish ways. Hell will freeze over before I go one day without dropping something or tripping or slipping or… Ah hell, who am I kidding." She sat there for awhile on top of him, in her own little world, still chastising herself, but then realized that she was just sitting on him while roaming the borders of her unconscious. "Ahh! Sorry, sorry, sorry!!! Jeeze, where ARE my manners today, first no introductions, then fooling around on the kitchen floor on top of Hige…" She stopped, her mind trailing into the perverted gutter of her psyche. Her face turned beet red. Her green eyes snapped wide open, hoping that Hige had ignored that last comment. Unfortunately, his face revealed that he hadn't missed one word. She dusted a trace amount of dust from her uniform and tried to rally her dignity once more and call it to attention.

"Well! At least we're getting to know each other." As she smiled a broad smile and studied him. "You know something? You look like my brother, sortof." Her jade orbs studied him a moment longer and then, as if pulled by an unseen force, her attention was drawn to the window. "OH MY GOD! It's snowing! I can't believe it! It was so warm out today! Wow!"

Hige's eyes were also drawn towards to sight outdoors. 'Snow is…nice.' He let out a disappointed sigh, 'I swear, elephants will ride unicycles before I ever get away from that damn frozen water!'

Toboe was cloaked in a wide and caressing curtain of steam.

"Ahhhhh, a bath, a nice how bath. How long has it been, lovely? Too long!" He chattered to himself. "Whoever said that animals don't like baths obviously couldn't tell their ass from their elbow." He settled deeper into the warm water and allowed himself to be intoxicated by the steam and the hot liquor. It soothed and massaged his fatigued muscles like a professional masseuse. He couldn't help but start thinking about how he got to this strange and inviting place. The last thing he remembered was a loved one in danger and a flash, a pain, and then it was over. His body showed no scars but deep inside, his instinct told him what had happened.

_Okay, note: I have no idea which episode of Wolf's Rain that the previous paragraph was from but it was in the end. If you want to know what I'm talking about, I suggest you surf around online for an episode summary because I don't want to spoil anything for you guys. _

Drawn from his contemplations, he heard a shriek and a crash, then giggling. 'She tripped over something again. But wait a moment, isn't that Hige's laugh. How come Hige gets all the girls.' He pouted. 'I'd better get out or my fur will fall off like wool on a sheep, and I assume that a naked wolf wouldn't look half as pretty.'

He stood up and shivered at the sudden blast of cold air that coaxed goose bumps out of his flesh. "Towel, towel, towel, I need a towel!" He shivered, doubling the goose bumps covering his body. He felt around the room with his hand because the steam was so thick, you could cut it with a knife. Finally he was rewarded as his hand came in contact with a furry, course piece of fabric hanging from the far wall. He quickly dried himself off, feeling very refreshed, then gazed down on his clothes, dirty, smelly, and practically in rags.

"Okay, after that nice bath, there is no way in HELL that I am getting back into those clothes." Then, after just a moment of pondering what to do he remembered Sumi's offer of clean clothes. He carefully made his way to the door, careful not slip like his clutzy hostess, and poked his head out into the hall. He shivered again as even more gooseflesh was raised on his bare torso for the air in the hall was yet considerably colder then that of the bathroom.

With Tsume passed out on the couch, Kiba had a lot of free time in his hands, or paws if you will, to think things through. It was amazing. He didn't even remember anything before landing in this odd new place. Something drastic had happened, he knew it, but not being able to access it in the deepest confines of his mind frustrated him. Kiba, being the excellent guard dog that he was (don't get angry if you like Kiba, it's a figure of speech), kept a tally on all of the activities of the house, from the floundering host and Hige's raucous laughter to Toboe's calm seclusion up in the bathroom to Tsume's muscled chest gently moving up and down in the peace of slumber. He once again turned his attention inward to his mind to solve the puzzlement that was inside him. For as long as he tried, not one thing would reveal itself to him and as he become more and more frustrated, his body became wearier and wearier. His eyelids were as lead as they slowly descended and he was taken away into the world of unconsciousness.

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**Author's Note:** This chapter is okay. I dunno, I'm very critical of my work. I hope you guys liked it. . 


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